Best Newcomer: JETAre you kidding me? This mother of two was the female winner last season, and home girl did a few crunches ad added some blue streaks before entering the arena as a Gladiator. Evan is also back, but much less impressive (and consequently featured much less in the show. Jet was in practically every event).
Returning Favorites: TITAN and WOLF
These two, more god than mortal, are everything a Gladiator should be. Disgustingly ripped, over tanned and over oilled, and incredibly full of themselves.....I wish they were my close personal friends. Yes, wolf perfected his howl and made more fantastic threats ("Consider that a birthday present. You're not getting anymore."). Yes, Titan did that fantastically vulgar leg wiggle that both horrifies and intrigues me. And yes, when these two came out for the Pyramid event, Wolf leap-frogged over a standing Titan. Which is when I gave a standing ovation.
Worst New Addition: PHOENIXCall me crazy, but a chick with angel wings and an early90s Drew Barrymore dye job just doesn't intimidate me. She looks more like an XMen character than a resident of Mount Olympus. Get this girl off my show and straight to ComiCon. Nuff said.
Biggest Letdown: VERTIGOSuper lame. Swaying back and forth with no physical contact. I was at least hoping that they would sway into one another or something. Yawn.
Best New Game (So Far): ROCKETBALLYou push a button and get launched up into the sky towards a giant basket ball hoop (similar to the less intense bungee version seen on the childhood hit GUTS). AND there are two Gladiators launching themselves skyward, blocking the competitors shots. Bonus: everyone looks like a superhero when they shoot upwards. Seriously-- one guy even put his hand on his hip. Also good news: The Eliminator has been improved (dropping off the handbike is no longer an advantage), AND there are still 5 more events to be revealed.
If any of you would like to partake in the viewing of this stunning display of athleticism, feel free to come to my casa on Mondays at 7. Cupcakes will be served.
7 comments:
I'm not sure you even realize how excited I am that you took the time to thoroughly dissect the American Gladiators world. I will (seriously) be downloading last night's competition, er... episode, and watching next week so I will be up-to-date for your next play by play. Long live the Gladiator!
what extensive depictions... colorful... enough said
But careful of the cupcakes...some are served with quarters in the middle.
I can smell the sweet competion!
Love it! Love you! nuff said...oh and I officiall deleted your door code today. I was sad....took me long enough but I think it's time for me to move on.
I would so love to be on that show. That would be the sweetest thing ever.
...and ioeachoo.
it's so funny that people are surprised by the effort you put into posting about gladiator. they obviously don't know you like we do.
aren't you excited to watch the whole season again with us, and watch the child-like and wonder and awe on our faces?
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