Dear Person Who Broke Into My Car Last Night:
I am sorry that the troubling economy has caused you to feel like you needed to help yourself to my vehicular property. I am sorry I didn't provide anything of value for you, but really what did you expect from a car that looks like mine? I hope that you tried the BMW that parks next to me, surely he has a little more to offer than a 96 Acura that's seen better days. I'm also sorry that someone beat you to the punch and broke into my car 2 years ago and taught me not to leave anything in my car, which is really too bad because not only would my ipod fetch a reasonable price on ebay, but there is a lot of great music and tv shows on there (Have you seen the Rachel Zoe Project? I think you'd really like it) that you could have enjoyed while you waited for the highest bidder.
I know that it must have been irksome to walk away from this car empty-handed, and you likely left my parking garage in quite a bad mood. However, bad mood or not, I think it is completely uncivilized for you to have walked away and left my little car in such a state of disarray. Burglar or not, I have to believe that at some point in your life someone taught you to pick up after yourself. And if you really take the time to think about it, cleaning up after yourself would have only benefited you...I likely would not have even noticed you'd been there, so I wouldn't have let the HOA know, and then all the other residents wouldn't be so alert to shady characters and other security matters, which will only make your job more difficult. And now I am annoyed that I had to start my very early morning by shoving all of my ipod/phone chargers back into the center console and picking up pennies from my ashtray, which has caused me to alert an even larger crowd (don't be fooled, I estimate the readership of this blog to be in the thousands), so you can go ahead and count them out as future resources as well. I hope you've learned a lesson from this.
Sincerely,
The Integra in spot #51
8 comments:
Huh...maybe I shouldn't have called and told you to move your car last night. My bad.
Sounds like you need some LP for your parking garage.
PS you're still one of the funniest people I know.
oh no!!!! That's terrible!!! Doesn't it make you feel a little bit sneaky and like you secretly slapped him that there was nothing in it for him to get away with though? I love it.
Oh, and don't worry that this morning I walked out to my car and someone had drawn penises in the dust on my back window. Lovely. Someone lovvvves me!
Oh, and don't worry that this post inspired a similar post of my own. I hate feeling like someone copied so I'm just going to own up to it right away. You inspired me.
That sucks! That street rat!
of all the luck. who gets their car broken into not only once but twice?!
good thing you learned your lesson 2 years ago and all the good are kept safely inside.
OMG. It happened again. Your car must be a magnet or something. I can't believe it. BTW, you are seriously the funniest person EVER.
My friend Lindsay who lives in the same apt as you do got her snowboard and boots stolen too that night. Tell those mother truckers they are going down!
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